My Whole Thought.

Couldn't believe,

such death

could happen

to anyone.

Don't catch the moments he wanted to give me.

What if I'm too young?

And how could they, not mention she.

Live as if he hadn't died.

It hurts so much,

but they can't get it,

they'll never do.

He wanted us to live and make our "things" as if we don't have enough time.

No one wants to be different,

but sometimes

it's the only way to get love.

I don't want to chase future anymore,

I want to stuck in past.

with those times

he lived.

And sometimes,

when it feels like that,

I wish I could.. let it go.

And fall.

Will he remember me?

It's been so much.

So much to think and breath and get,

and decide.

Just rapidly, as much as possible.

Since I'm getting lost.

Don't know if I could ever make these short-middle-cut sentences into a real diary.

maybe I would.

Well, then. I'm just a soul who knows NOTHING of this world but wished she could.

A soul who misses something. All the time.

A soul who gets up at 4 a.m and tries not to scream  from the pain.

The pain of the fear.

It's not like I'm  leaned on other people,

I just need to fix the right way of life in my mind.

Getting lost in the so many options.

Want him so bad. Despite limitations.

When all you can sorrow  for is blindness and uncertain future,

you know you're in trouble.

I've just started to understand.