It sounds so stupid when I try to write it down,
no words can express the amount of frustation
the amount of sadness.
I keep looking for the top.
Either it's hidden or I'm just an evil.
And I keep thinking of the will,
and what they would say
when I die.
I feel like I don't have the strengh to stay here anymore,
how weak, so stupid. can't even stop the tears.
Some people live in this world and don't know why.
And I don't want to know.
Let's call it.. "giving up due to prior knowledge". That sounds better.
I remain powerless against these thoughts.
And I know they want to pull me down.
But I've never belonged in here.
There's a reason why I don't tell her this.
I don't want her to be so 'this world is wonderful, you're the one who can't see it'.
Well, I've tried.
Sometimed I wish I hadn't known where the gun is.
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